The Addiction to Certainty
CERTAINTY : The thing we pursue to make us feel secure, yet is often the threshold we must step across to live well, love completely and dream big.
Certainty. Oh beloved certainty.
You have promised SO much, offering comfort in times of fear in liberation from the fierceness of creativity. The box of boundaries include your identical twin of safety and you both offer powerful guidance to take the feelings of regret, shame and embarrassment down to the basement of my soul and never look upon again.
You have become plain. Like vanilla ice cream, it offers the ease of non-decision, yet packs the calories all the same, neither enjoying the rocky road or absorbing the tantalizing flavor of the rainbow found in life's buffet.
There is danger afoot. Adventure, the enemy of certainty, has swept in, knocked on this castle door, beating against the strong walls of solitude, yelling taunts of thrills and excitement.
Just as Siddartha bid goodbye to a life of luxury to discover enlightenment, every butterfly must painfully allow the fluids to reach its wing so as to fully span into its array of colors, taking flight. I also must leave this box of safety, never to return.
Heed the call of of the unknown and venture forth. In trust of this adventure, there will be companions that come alongside for aid, to move forward in their efforts to also spread wings of glory.
No longer bowing to the false gods of possessions, caught in the never ending mouse wheel of maintaining the trappings of accomplishment, today, commit to living here in this time called NOW.
When fear shows its taunting face, seething with the viciousness of a hungry lion stalking from behind and eager to pounce upon my dreams, I'll respond with one bold action, I'll do nothing and in such, see it for what it really is. Nothing. No hiding, defending, fighting or other high efficiency tactics to cope and deal with the way things are.
Call it surrender, prayer, mediation, recovery or dozens of other quality modalities in the form of religion or spirituality, life can break free into its own unique brand of beauty. Strung together in grace-filled moments, human form becomes infused with the charms of smiles and a peace of transcendence from confusion.
Many a knee has been taken in reverence to the cross of the Christ. Wrists boast the resonant jewelry of the Buddha's beads along with hand crafted jewelry channeled from the divine of source. Millions travel to the lands called Holy, books consumed to help the thing we call "self" grow and reach a state that is never fully defined causing our fixation to grow stale and our spirit to become painfully discontent.
We are seeking, and seeking with desperation to the answers of questions we don't fully understand. At some point, we simply must turn and face our obsessive and insatiable need to certainty.
Spiritual transcendence, life growth, epic romantic love partnering, business success...all of it is birthed from one bold move of someone that risked tremendously, to let go of what is known and venture into the faith of discovering what would come next. Anyone faced with this life decision will be experiencing discomfort. As if laying on a bed of needles, you'll feel a constant ache in your soul as it purges from your body in the form of a calling.
You have a choice. You may anesthetize the call In the pendulum of choices to numb the voice. From the intoxication of liquor to the incessant chatter of perpetuated drama, you can avoid, dodge and shimmy from the grip of Gods voice that is leading you through the perilous journey of opportunistic calling and nobody will call you on it. No one will rescue you from your choice to ignorance or present the notion of cowardice to look upon. No my friend, chase life's treasures with an honest diligence and ambitious tenacity and you'll be exalted among men, praised by the people.
But...is that your calling? You have another choice. You can feel it. It's the nagging voice in still moments, the restless quiver, the dry tear before it can reach full expression and the glory on the other side of recovery from addiction and the compulsions you no longer care to hide after full surrender.
Quit certainty. Like a life-long smoker that makes a decision and quits cold turkey, just quit. In that moment you will breathe. There you will live well.
~Robin